Is it “Beetlejuice” or “Betelgeuse”? Legends defer, but it seems as if “the official version” pegs him as named after a mysterious galactic star-cluster, up in wicked, ethereal Victorian parlance as it has one foot in that old-world, somewhere between a dray-horse and an old gravedigger’s stove-top as it’s a plank of old, morbid Americana.
But “Beetlejuice”– like rotten-green spit running down your chin, and other disgusting ideas, not to be mixed-up with “Minute Maid” orange-juice, which is really quite tasty and a nice product plug-in, for playing a round of charades. I guess, “Beetlejuice” is, pronunciation-wise, easier to understand than any obscure reference as give me a visual-cue, and I think “pesky insect”. . . . . and Halloween gross-out.
So maybe we’ll call him “Beetlejuice” to make-it easier. He don’t mind, just say the magic words “to turn on the juice, and see what breaks loose– Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!” Some ground rules– “say it once, say it twice, salesman and rot and everything nice– THE KING OF VICE– put the champagne on ice– ROLL THAT DICE” for some beetle-bumptious discount-chain variety, hilarity, and insanity– or I haven’t been itchin’ my balls TO MAKE A CUM-BACK, E-Z 1-2-3, flash & filigree graveyard madness talkin’ at ‘ya live/undead from stranger parts, unknown– so welcome to the blog, in earnest– moving to a cemetery, near you– yeah, yeah, fiddle-dee/dee yowwwwwwwww!”
Any resemblance to rarefied “Beetle-talk” is purely coincidental, and hey– we give a way a demon possession for every literary exorcism, and have plenty of snakes and lizards for the copyright police to play-with, so that **shouldn’t** be a problem, so come-on down and enjoy this exercise in fan-fiction. B-b-b-beetlejuice!