Scream Until you Like It!!

Ah, something from my pre-school youth as true to the Halloween of ’86/’87 as can be blackly, subconsciously gleaned from proton-consciousness. Call it an era of “He-Man” and Gobots as everything trailed a long like a kind of half-logical “non sequitur” for an early mind that lived in dread of midnight nightmares.

You had the sensation “of being carried, along” as I remember being invited to a backyard Halloween party from one of the kids at school as there was a long “trash-bag tunnel” hanging up by trees, out by a strobe-light. Skipping around in my “Skeletor” costume, as I was too scared to make much headway there, over the course of the evening though I sidled-up, close– half-daring to. What was in that black maw? Anything, I suppose– and how things seemed to turn real if you imagined them, enough as you groped through surreality.

Maybe I’d retreat inside deeper to find a table hung with spider-webs as Beetlejuice lit a match and took a long drag off a foul, ookey cigaratte. And then offering to buy your soul like something out of a twisted fairy-tale as he tapped the ashes on the table. Flanked by an army of trolls and tangled “tree-monsters” making moans in the chill air.

The sale was so potentially awful and shiveringly “FINAL”, off you’d bolt from the goblin-hole as monstrous laughter followed you like something out of a creepy fairy-tale– like all of hell was pursing you through the inky, scrabbling blackness.

The world was certainly filled with lots of cheap horror movies and swords n’ sorcery you’d see in video-stores, which leads us to¬† “Ghoulies 2”.

Ah, they don’t make ’em like they used to.

You suspect that a young Winona was almost cast in this, like cute girl/big-eyed home video bait for all the kids watching at home, over an ordered pizza and sleep-over “fright-fest” at a friends’ house. The effects “were what they were” at the time as it amounted to rubber puppeteering and fog machines, and few goodies in the way of computers. The same, with “Critters” or anything falling in the copy-cat footsteps of “Gremlins”.

So Blackie Lawless of W.A.S.P. dressed like a Dungeon/Star trickster stars in a video/metal single that promotes the movie, similar to Dokken in “Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors”. Pure cross-promotional gold as it seemed– back in the early days of MTV. It doesn’t take long to put two & two together in emerging media forms as that was considered the golden touch of marketing.

I think a few beasties like this might make their way into “Beetlejuice 2”. No promises. So stay tuned for our next installment and happy “All Hallow’s Eve” to you listeners. So say it once, twice for effect, third time for “good luck”– “BEETLEJUICE 2 RULES!!”.

Scream until you like it. . . . .

Scream Until you Like It!!

Surreal Side-Bit from Gremlins 2

This was a funny clip that appeared only in the video-version of “Gremlins 2: The New Batch” as a kind of “break”, a surreal interlude as the monsters seemed to be commenting, “outside of the movie” even while the story continued.

It would be interesting, to have “a movie”, inside a movie as a big joke about the film, “Beetlejuice 2” is how wretched, the birthing process of a sequel would be– from script-meetings among the intergalactic movie-heads of state, dressed in foam-rubber costumes like evil overlords of Warner Bros. They would be narrating the action, or bridging the scenes, together with off-screen commentary as key details would be reversed like live editing revisions. . . . . self-kidding the audience of how wretched this movie is, like the nature of most reboots and sequels..

A crowd of anticipating Beetlejuice fans show-up at the premier of a movie, “Beetlejuice Returns” that hasn’t been made, yet as the star is nowhere, to be seen. And how the action, follows him “in another frame” as his random adventures coalesce together, to form an intricate-plot that more fully blooms, by implication of his wandering interest on a day-to-day level that eventually snowballs into “saving the universe”.

The movie would have a lot of “Beetlejuice” featured, about 50/50 with Lydia off on her own death-rock local cable access program and how their fates, intertwine– like a sacred “undead link” between the strange & unusual. As Beetlejuice becomes more solid, more corporeal, Lydia begins “to fade-out of the universe” and take-on more ghostly qualities as she visits the after-life and has dreams and hallucinations– a perfect part for “a musical bridge” with classic death-rock bands and CGI interludes.

You can’t fault-me on “lack of originality”, as this film would become a new landmark in comedy and rock-the-house down. Plenty of commissions from licensed t-shirts, as they would be featured in the movie like product-placement spots and later, sold to the outside consumer-market as we “write our own ticket”.

The more readers that come to this blog, the more likely it will happen. So share with your friends and let’s generate some serious grassroots web-traffic that the studios can’t ignore. Thanks again, for reading!

Surreal Side-Bit from Gremlins 2