Lobster Man from Mars…..

Down a video aisle near you….. according to the forgone graveyard of VHS Flea-Market gems for one’s stupefaction and bargain-basement delight.

A movie about “A really bad movie” shopped around to a sleazy Hollywood Mogul who seeks out a box-office “tax write-off” to dodge the wrath of the hungry IRS.

The filmmaker screens his film and the potential distributor– sitting there pulling his sweaty collar with a giant medallion– is shocked & amazed.

Like he’s privileged to witness the next “Citizen Kane” of drive-in pictures and exploitation bait, “as the market goes”. . . . . and call this a PG-rated grindhouse of zonkers fun.

The poor kid wrote, directed, produced, and edited his “bedroom-tinkered opus”.

It’s the kind of thing Beetlejuice would watch in his scuzzy dirt-mound of a dwelling at 4 A.M. on a Friday. . . . . hitting the road afterward to grab a huge sports mug of French Vanilla coffee down at the local 24-hour Quicktrip.

It’s called NEET– “N.either E.mployed, in E.ducation, or T.raining” across the rolling scrub-lands and apartment complexes of glorious marginality.

Here, the world is early-dawn-gray like a television tuned to a dead channel.

Ahhh, the joys of social-security disability.

Just don’t break into cars and find oneself in the back of a squad car or even featured on an episode of “COPS”.

GOD BLESS AMERICA, “PATRIOT”.

Lobster Man from Mars…..

“Cannibal Dead-Wood”


Lost. . . . . . “in the neck of the woods” of something VERY BEETLEJUICE.

The first musical **ever** about a regionally-famous cannibal of the old American West named Alfred Packer. Brought to you by TROMA FILMS (“of courrrrssse”) and reflected by the micro-budget.

Yes, Trey Parker and Matt Stone— writing & filming “what they know” from a small mountain town up in Colorado and one of their earlier works before they got famous for SOUTH PARK on Comedy Central.

So you could see Beetlejuice up in the mountains in a checkered shirt and his wild nimbus of hair “like untreated mental illness” and a fine example of rugged frontier spirit.

Death comes riding down “on the ole’ Thunder-Chief” with plenty of tourists, off-loading with their bags as Beetlejuice befriends them. More are always coming to “Dead-Wood”.

 

Not only a land of pioneers but the requisite parasites “preying on naïve city-slickers”, be this clopping horse-hooves and a pinch of gold dust as he infests the trading post “prospecting” for victims before “run out of town on a rail”.

America was built “on fast talk” but he’d prefer HOT AIR to “hard labor”.

Why, he just “picks-up” for the next town with a miserable hang-over, plucking out the tarred-feathers and flopping down with the pigs. Living on plunder or absolute poverty “with equal ease” as he chews on a leg of mule-meat, explaining how he gets “hungry as a bear”.

  

Meanwhile, Lydia places the role of “dance-hall girl” in her bonnet and cowboys fight over her. Is Hollywood any different? I’ll take my chances in CANNIBAL DEAD-WOOD. . . . . . (?!)

“Cannibal Dead-Wood”

BUBBA THE REDNECK WEREWOLF

Bringing you quality entertainment the next town over from Beetlejuice’s Rockin’ Graveyard Revue. I sense “cross-over” material in that godforsaken south county apartment, like a play-pen of sin and bleary-eyed malfeasance. United “UNHOLY FORCES”– the meeting of the minds. It’s all “yonder Highway 44” on the outskirts of St. Louis. . . . .

  

 

Visit this gnarly animal here at: http://www.bubbawolfmovie.com/

BUBBA THE REDNECK WEREWOLF

Halloween Make-up Tips

When you wish upon a star. . . . .

Halloween Make-up Tips